Justine: All I Want for Christmas…Fantasy Style

justine covington, writing, writers, christmasKudos to Nancy for knowing what she wants for Christmas. I rarely do, and irritate my husband when he asks me what I want and I answer, “I don’t know. I don’t really need anything.” (I can see him GRRRRing right now.)

Well, this year is different. I know what I want. The problem is I doubt anyone (even Santa!) can deliver.

My Christmas List — Fantasy Style (in no particular order):

  1. A wrinkle in the space-time continuum. Or maybe a black hole. Whatever it is, I want more TIME. Time to sleep, time to write, time to spend with my kids, to watch movies, to exercise, to work in my kids’ classes, and to sleep. Wait, I already mentioned that. I figure I need a 36-hour day to get everything done that I want to do — with an additional 8 hours for sleep. I guess that makes it a 44-hour day. Maybe Neil deGrasse Tyson can help. Does anyone know his email address?
  2. The same staff you’d find at Pemberly. A personal secretary, housekeeper, upstairs maids, downstairs maids, laundresses, a butler, a coachman, footmen, and a gardener. The personal secretary and housekeeper would be most important. So would the maids. And the laundress. Hell, I need them all. Oh, I can’t forget the nursemaid, either! (Feel free to throw in Mr. Darcy as a stocking stuffer!)
  3. A marketing guru and support staff. Someone to help me Tweet and FB and blog and all that other stuff. Someone to keep me on track. Oops, that’s the personal secretary. I’ve never been keen at marketing and I’m not a big fan of “putting myself out there.” Frankly, with a husband who travels and two little kids, I’m having a hard time keeping track of the day-to-day stuff of life, much less marketing myself and a book that isn’t even published yet.
  4. A personal masseuse. I have a heck of a knot in my shoulder that’s been bugging me for weeks now and I haven’t had time to go in and have someone work it out. I’d love to have a set of strong, magical hands work their magic while I sit at the keyboard. Writing AND getting a massage?!? It’s a two-fer!
  5. Unlimited, unrestricted frequent flyer miles. I’ve got historical places to go, ancient things to see! How can I write a good historical novel without doing some research? Okay, a lot of research? England, Scotland, New England, South Dakota, France, Ireland, New Zealand…it’s a hodge-podge of locations (and that’s just the short-list), but it’s all on my list.

I’m sure there’s more I could ask for, but I think this is a good, short start. This is pie-in-the-sky, moon-and-stars type stuff, so I should probably keep it lean.

What sort of fantastical, other-worldly things do you want for Christmas (or your specific holiday)? There’s no limits and the more outrageous and impossible the better!

21 thoughts on “Justine: All I Want for Christmas…Fantasy Style

  1. (-: On a completely practical level, how many hours of babysitting would your normal Christmas gift cost your husband? If you could get that, that would knock one and two off your list, at least for a week or two.

    I, like the scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz, would like a brain. I seem to have misplaced mine and it’s been replaced with gray fuzz and the earbugs of some very old songs. Please, Santa? I’ve been a good girl all year long . . . .

    • Oh, I should have added “brain” to my list, too! I’m forgetting everything these days.

      I think you’ve been very good this year, Michaeline, so I’m crossing my fingers there’s something big (and smart!) in your stocking this year!

  2. Your list is pretty much my list, Justine, except instead of a masseuse, I’d want a cook. (That might come under the item “same staff you’d find at Pemberly.”) And I can’t say I’m desperate to travel. But generally—yeah. Finding the time to juggle all our needs and wants is pretty tough. I’m confident that Santa, if she brings nothing else, will bring me so many organizational skills for Christmas that I won’t need the rest of that stuff!

    • I think “cook” follows under “staff at Pemberly.” Pretty much anyone who was employed at Pemberly can come work for me. 😀

      Here’s hoping Santa finds some organizational skills (and perhaps some tools?) to put under your tree this year.

  3. As my daughter used to say when she was about 5 years old – “I want dat!!!” (which she said to everydamnthing). Especially TIME. I could use more of that. My list would also include someone else deciding what’s for dinner. Would that come with the staff at Pemberly?

    • I clearly was amiss in not mentioning a cook when listing the Pemberly staff. Perhaps because my husband has been traveling the last couple weeks and I’ve been making the kids grilled cheese, PBJ, and other “easy” things (hot dogs, anyone?), cooking hasn’t been on my mind. When I was drafting this post, I had “scullery maid” listed, then took it out. I really should have left that on in there, too, because I hate to do the dishes.

  4. Time – oh, yes, please, and the massage, and the frequent flyer miles. I’d love a giant gift box full of inspiration, and some magic mojo to help me write faster.

    I’d love somebody to handle all my routine chores, and somebody else to deal with marketing and social media, but I wouldn’t want people living in my house. Maybe they could come in super-early, while I’m asleep, and then disappear, leaving the house sparkling, the paperwork done and the fridge full of good things to eat.

    While we’re in the realms of fantasy, I’d also like to wake up on Christmas Day to discover that my house has been refurbished. I’d like it to be done by Jenny from Heyer’s A Civil Contract – everything just as it is now, but as good as new, and no noise, mess or hassle. Jenny renovated Adam’s stately home and made it look easy – she’d handle my 3-bedroomed Victorian semi in the blink of an eye!

    • Oh, A Civil Contract was such a good book. Poor Jenny put up with so much. And she was so careful when she renovated Adam’s home.

      Speaking of books, I’m listening to A Lady of Quality right now. Damn, Ms. Heyer is a good storyteller! Adverbs and all (because I’ve been paying particular attention to that).

      I like the idea of people coming in before you wake…sort of like Christmas elves!

  5. Time is my big fantasy wish, especially since I’ve become terrible at managing it these past few months, maybe because I have lots of different kinds of projects going at once, making me feel very scattered. And I just went down some rabbit holes on Amazon and found about another dozen books in the course of 10 minutes that I want…So, I’m definitely wishing for time to do all the things and to Read. All. The. Books!

    • Nancy, I’m with you on the multiple projects. Stupid me is trying to finish my book for the GH, I volunteered to run a new writing contest in the beginning of the year for our local chapter, and I also volunteered to co-chair the Beau Monde’s Royal Ascot contest, which is more late spring/early summer, but we’re getting things going on that right now. Plus Christmas, plus a new puppy come Monday, plus my parents visiting for the holidays, plus my husband traveling. I don’t even want to show you my desk right now. When you come in January for our writer’s retreat, please don’t open any closet doors! It’s where I’ll be hiding everything!

      Did I mention the Elf of the Shelf? I haven’t moved the damn thing in 3 days and my kids are getting anxious, because I told them Harry (our elf) wasn’t visiting Santa because their behavior had been so bad lately (which, in truth, it has). *sigh* At least I pre-stuffed the Advent calendar full of candy. I forgot that all the time last year.

        • I don’t think it’s a very old tradition; I only started hearing about it 10 years ago or so. It’s based on a children’s book, I think. It’s really adorable — I see some bloggers who take pictures of their elf in cute poses around the house. Aspirational . . . I don’t have clean enough of a house to pose the elf, and I’d forget to move the thing. (I buy pre-stuffed chocolate Advent calendars each year, too (-:. Things get busy in December!!) That’s assuming I had the photographic skills . . . .

        • Be glad you don’t know about it. If you want to be entertained, go to Pinterest and view some elf on the shelf ideas. If you want to laugh, look up the naughty elf on the shelf pics!

  6. What a brilliant list Justine – it says it all. Hold on, I would just like to add an Elf to unpack all my boxes in our new house (and find my slippers that are still in an unnamed box).

    • If you can’t find your slippers, better put them on your list to Santa! And I’m so with you on the unpacking. When we moved to Arizona, it was a corporate move, so my husband’s new company paid for it. One of the things they offered was for people to unpack and take the boxes away. All well and good, except “unpack” means literally that. Not “put away.” They took the stuff out of the boxes and set it down on the floor where each box had been sitting, so instead of having some tidy boxes stacked against a wall, I had stacks of JUNK. I’m never doing that again.

      • Oh, that’s funny, Justine. You’ve actually managed to make me feel grateful for having all my things still hidden away in boxes – when we put the Christmas tree up yesterday we just shoved them all to the other side of the room!

  7. Pingback: Nancy: Linkety-Links to Discounted Books (and Related Swag!) | Eight Ladies Writing

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